5 Second Hooks

JigokuBosatsu · Post by **JigokuBosatsu** » Wed Jun 26, 2013 10:40 pm

The PCs discover- in any fitting location- an ancient puzzle box. One combat round after solving it with a DC 25 Knowledge: Arcana check, barbed chains shoot from the walls (or box itself if no walls are present), and 1d6 kythons appear.

Okay, technically this is "6 second hooks" but who gives a shit.

hyzmarca · Post by **hyzmarca** » Wed Jun 26, 2013 11:56 pm

Every time the party has an adventure they run across a team of what appear to be glory-hogging penis-substitute DMPCs who always steal the show.

If they hang around the DMPCs they find themselves besiged by various odd occurances and being forced to make saves at regular intervals for no apparant reason.

If they secretly follow the DMPCs back to their base camp they discover a mysterious arch, which looks something like this.

rampaging-poet · Post by **rampaging-poet** » Thu Jun 27, 2013 5:08 am

RadiantPhoenix wrote:
rampaging-poet wrote:A childless king is searching for a worthy heir to his throne. He's actually an ancient necromancer who has possessed his successor every generation since he founded the kingdom.
Oh hey, that sounds like one of the former villains from a certain children's comic book series.

I wasn't deliberately referencing anything there, but it doesn't surprise me that it's already been used.

(Mandatory "everything is backwards" plot). A rampaging princess is demanding all dragons in the surrounding countryside swear fealty to her, killing all who refuse. Stop her before she a) gathers an unstoppable army, or b) wakes the Great Wyrm Red Dragon sleeping beneath a nearby mountain.

An aboleth ate your spymaster. Track the memory fish down before it can use your own intelligence network against you.

The planet is being invaded by spacefaring kraken.

An undead Fire Mage is trying to create a rift that will send the entire planet to the Quasi-Elemental Plane of Ash.

The map you need was in a mansion that burned down decades ago, but its double on the Plane of Shadow might be intact.

The simple peasant girl you just met is actually...

... the chosen hero foretold by the prophecy you just unearthed.
... the missing prince under a geas not to reveal his true identity.
... the missing prince, living the simple life he'd always dreamed of.
... a talented sorceress unaware of her true power.
... a simulacrum sent by the archmage of a nearby kingdom.
... a super-powered robot built to replace her creator's real daughter.
... the last avatar of a forgotten god.
... the werewolf that's been terrorizing the countryside.
... a dragon hiding from the adventurers that drove it from its lair.
... an amnesiac ghost that doesn't realize she's dead.

I know this last set isn't all that original, but I had a few ideas and wanted to pad it to ten entries. Most of them would be pretty simple to expand into something more complicated or just drop straight into a session and run with.

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Thu Jun 27, 2013 12:21 pm

The king has been polymorphed into a dog that is inexplicably capable of still speaking. He hasn't let this stop him from his day to day activities, and has decided that he likes his new form. This wouldn't be a problem, except he still keeps schmoozing with the ladies, and everyone is getting really grossed out. Talk him out of his current choice, convince everyone else that it's not as bad as they think, or turn everyone else into talking dogs.

Omegonthesane · Post by **Omegonthesane** » Thu Jun 27, 2013 12:52 pm

RobbyPants wrote:The king has been polymorphed into a dog that is inexplicably capable of still speaking. He hasn't let this stop him from his day to day activities, and has decided that he likes his new form. This wouldn't be a problem, except he still keeps schmoozing with the ladies, and everyone is getting really grossed out. Talk him out of his current choice, convince everyone else that it's not as bad as they think, or turn everyone else into talking dogs.

How about a wedding pact with a local pack of blink dogs?

You have awoken from the slumber of millennia into eternal new life. Get a passport, get a bank account, and get a job.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Thu Jun 27, 2013 1:51 pm

RadiantPhoenix wrote:
ishy wrote:The clergy of LG god <x> have started a crusade, in your kingdom, against having sex while under polymorph effects, claiming it is 'unnatural'.
The druids of the kingdom have declared war on them stating something to the effect of, "... the hell it is!"

Your universal guild of necrophiliac taxidermists support the druids and the clerics. Help them.

Vebyast · Post by **Vebyast** » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:39 am

Omegonthesane wrote:You have awoken from the slumber of millennia into eternal new life. Get a passport, get a bank account, and get a job.

An ancient necropolitan digs its way through your floor, tells you it just awoke from millennia of slumber, and politely asks for a cup of tea. The local paladins will torture you to death if they find out you were anywhere near it. Help the hapless sleeper escape the gestapo and flee the country, and whatever you do, don't get caught.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:50 am

Death has apparently checked out. Your friend who was supposed to die is still walking around and the whole thing is a bit embarrassing, especially as he now needs to think about every function of his body. Also the surplus of life energy is causing other odd things to happen, such as swear words springing to life out of thin air. Do something about it.

Wiseman · Post by **Wiseman** » Sat Jun 29, 2013 12:46 am

A war god has secretly killed the leaders of both sides of the war, and is impersonating them. He hopes by expanding the conflict, he will draw other powers into the battle.

hyzmarca · Post by **hyzmarca** » Sat Jun 29, 2013 12:07 pm

The mayor's prized heirloom pocketwatch was swallowed by an owlbear. Get it back.

Vebyast · Post by **Vebyast** » Sat Jun 29, 2013 8:30 pm

The mayor's favorite thoroughbred owlbear was swallowed by a mad artificer's pocketwatch. Get it back. Or, at least, get enough of it back to continue its line.

rampaging-poet · Post by **rampaging-poet** » Sun Jun 30, 2013 4:09 pm

Giant ants have colonized a long-unused city-scale war golem. Drive them out and repair the modules they damaged.
Alternatively, Formians have colonized the war golem, and they must be stopped before they finish the repairs.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Sun Jun 30, 2013 4:24 pm

rampaging-poet wrote:Giant ants have colonized a long-unused city-scale war golem. Drive them out and repair the modules they damaged.
Alternatively, Formians have colonized the war golem, and they must be stopped before they finish the repairs.

The Formian's subcontracted the work to you, take care of those dmpcs trying to stop you.

edit: These chained hooks we create seem to be much longer than 5-second hooks...

Sigil · Post by **Sigil** » Sun Jun 30, 2013 6:17 pm

Cynic wrote:These chained hooks we create seem to be much longer than 5-second hooks...

5-Second plot twists?

Desdan_Mervolam · Post by **Desdan_Mervolam** » Sun Jun 30, 2013 10:13 pm

Cynic wrote: edit: These chained hooks we create seem to be much longer than 5-second hooks...

Its okay; JigokuBosatsu's puzzle box makes chained hooks instantaneously.

name_here · Post by **name_here** » Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:57 am

A cabal of wizards has decided to construct a refuge for people fleeing various apocolypses on the Elemental Plane Of Air. They appear not to have any upper limit on the planned size, and the local inhabitants wish they and their armies of spell-casting constructs would stop.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Mon Jul 01, 2013 5:35 am

The characters wake up in individual plain, spartan cells, the only notable feature large ruby orbs embedded high on the back walls. A woman's voice can be heard, referring to them as "test subjects" and begins running them through a battery of deadly obstacle courses.

Vebyast · Post by **Vebyast** » Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:41 am

A horde of self-replicating clockwork automatons are eating a spherical volume out of the rich, unending mineral deposits on the Elemental Plane of Earth and destroying everything in their way. Find a way to shut down the swarm.

aseariel · Post by **aseariel** » Mon Jul 01, 2013 8:02 pm

You are under contract to stop an insane elder god. Your sponsor/contract holder is Asmodeus (whether or not you knew this, or what the contract was for before you signed it, is optional).

Neon Sequitur · Post by **Neon Sequitur** » Tue Jul 02, 2013 2:20 am

I actually ran this one: Escape From Outbackistan

Cross the badlands and fight off hordes of pyschic zombie bikers to rescue the last living ESPer on Earth.

Cynic · Post by **Cynic** » Tue Jul 02, 2013 5:26 pm

You are dream hunters stuck in a dream world but then the dreamer starts to dream within his dream and pulls you into it. Get the fuck out!

hyzmarca · Post by **hyzmarca** » Tue Jul 02, 2013 6:08 pm

Exploding corn.

rampaging-poet · Post by **rampaging-poet** » Wed Jul 03, 2013 8:14 pm

Fiendish hippos have invaded an important river.

Corsair114 · Post by **Corsair114** » Wed Jul 03, 2013 8:37 pm

An extremely intelligent Hydra has erupted from the town well and refuses to leave until its seven quests are completed within a week... and if they aren't, it'll wipe the village out with a massive cloud of poison.

Grek · Post by **Grek** » Wed Jul 03, 2013 9:56 pm

A fiendish river (water elemental) has invaded the temple of the Hippo God.

It's raining frogs. Poison frogs. Find out why.

Just before you slay the evil Dream Evil, you awaken from your sleep. It was all just a dream. Or was it?

In order to defeat the Harpy Queen, you must undertake a quest to release the NecroDancer from his silent prison.

A group of Gith pirates have found a map to the Astral Isle of Secret Chests and plan to rob all the chests. Get there first!